melancholic
just came back from night cycling with james, angeline and walther. thank God for a good time of fellowship and relatively minor problems (james-flat tyre, angeline & walther - loose/broken bike stand, myself - loose handlebar, dented pedals) and most of all thank God for journey mercies for the safe journey back.

actually much to say now i'm a bit perky and awake (just showered), while 5 mins away from home i decided to be a bit more daring and take the flyover, going up wasn't any much eventful and for a moment i lasped into a period of complancency. heading down there's a turnoff from the highway to the place i stay and i think a bit of a blindspot for me. thank God i saw the headlights abt 2 secs earlier and quickly sprinted across lanes. any slower and dn chia would be complaining abt why he got his bike spoilt/crushed/mangled (just kidding, thanks for the loan!). so thank God for keeping me safe.

anyways, i found out that one of us amongst the four had a similar thing when coming to relationships. we would like a girl and after praying for God's help then proceed on and somehow some unfortunate incident involvin family would happen at such a time. and thus feel doubly low.

if you ask me, i'd say i'm feelin really really low and yet quite high. so things dun work out all the time for the greater good but yet this time i've grown to trust Him more. i feel miserable, yes. i feel like crying at times, yes. i feel like blaming the other guy, yes. i feel like wishing and hoping they would break up, yes. BUT i just don't want to. why? good question! i've got no idea :P maybe God's wonder working power is working in me. nothing can hurt more than the weight of the world's sin on your shoulders.

"God, give us grace to accept with serenity the things that cannot be changed, courage to change the things which should be changed, and the wisdom to distinguish the one from the other."