caught in two minds over a lot of things.

starting with the most recent, i had my medical checkup by the ttsh docs and though my theraphist like told the docs she would feel it is advisable i downgrade, the doc that wrote my letter didn't seem to think so. anyways here is it, from what i can make out (from the handwriting)

Dear colleague, i write to you to update on the above patient's condition. He had (L) ulnar nerver anterior transposition in Nov 2003 for ulnar neropathy. currently still has slight (L) UL weakness with reduced grip strength. he also has an old (L) 5th toe P2# which has left him with fixed flexion deformity and he complains of pain with prolonged running. we have advised that he continue with his training as best as he can and we will review its impact on his condition in 3/12 we have also advised that he present early if his conditions deterioate

so i'm stuck. do i go and show it to the MO @ cmpb asap or wait till i get sucked into ptp before reporting sick. both options are have their pros and cons but like seriously, who would wanna get thrown in? i'm worried that if i show the letter, i might not get my downgrade and worse still would find it more difficult to downgrade while inside. or wait till i'm inside and try to downgrade and use the letter as an "i-told you so" and probably get marked for the rest of my 2 years. those are the cons, pros however means that i won't go in anytime soon and with a downgrade, i hope i'm safe. then i can go for the nationals, which brings me to the 2nd pt.

nationals are definitely going to be delayed. like in 2 weeks time is the comp and the forms aren't even out yet. so it would mean a push back to maybe mid or end june (which if i don't get my downgrade i can forget abt going for). so to take a risk, sign up irregardless and hope to get the downgrade while in ptp or just don't bother at all.

and thus brings me back to the first sentence that "nationals are definitely going to be delayed.", which just like my payment from a certain RICHARD WEE (HON. SECRETARY OF SBSC) which he promised on 11/5 that he'll pay on 15/5 that he delayed to 18/5 which he further delayed to 19/5 and which he pushed back to 31-5 will be delayed yet again.

i think its time i got those letters ready for me to pass to him. then gg no re.

"We act as though comfort and luxury are the chief requirements of life, when all we need to make us really happy is something to be enthusiastic about (like God :)"